Just because.

I suddenly know the difference between Pampers, Luvs and Huggies and the pros and cons of each. Because I'm a diaper-conscious mommy. At 3 am, I can easily locate a pacifier, clean diaper, receiving blanket and Destin cream by just the light of the TV. Because I'm a sleep-deprived, but learning to function on 4ish hours of sleep mommy. I believe my little girl is the most beautiful and perfect baby I've ever seen. Because I'm a biased mommy. I used to be the type that had to have complete silence and darkness before I could go to sleep, but have now learned to sleep with the TV on and a sound machine loudly playing the sounds of ocean waves. Because I'm a mommy that would listen to a police siren if it would help my baby sleep. I come close to crying tears of happiness when my baby girl is crying and I pick her up and she immediately stops and sighs like being in my arms is her favorite place. Because I'm Avery's mommy. I lay awake at night and watch my baby sleeping, wondering what she's dreaming and watching her little chest rise and fall to make sure she's breathing right. Because I'm a mommy that worries. With every little cough and unexpected rash, I worry that she's getting sick and wonder what I can do to make sure she's always safe and healthy. Because I'm an overprotective mommy. I love hearing about other people's journeys through motherhood and welcome advice on how to keep my baby healthy and happy. Because I'm a new mommy. I walk through stores and am immediately drawn to the adorable baby clothes, even though I know she has a closet full of them at home. Because I'm a fashionable mommy. Even though I love having her here, I miss being able to feel her kicking my belly and always knowing where she is and that she's safe. Because I'm a formerly pregnant mommy. I will probably bore you to death with stories about my baby from now until the time she's 10. Because I'm a ridiculously proud mommy. I hate to argue with any of you that think your job is the best, but you're wrong. Mine is. Because I'm a mommy.

My crazy new life

Life. Is. Crazy. I'd heard it, but kind of blew off any advice that a newborn changes your life completely. Yes, I knew that it was going to happen, but when people would tell me that things were going to change, I just kind of had the nonchalant attitude of "Duh, I know." But trust me, until you're actually living it, until you go through hours of labor and have this little person given to you that you're completely and totally responsible for, you have absolutely NO idea. You have no idea what it's like to sit up at night and worry "Did she eat enough?" "Can she breathe?" "Is she too hot/cold/bundled up/not bundled enough??" Life has completely changed. My living room used to be (for the most part) organized and somewhat clean--focused on decorations and function. Now my living room has been taken over by a 2 week old baby. A bouncy seat, pack n play, swing, bassinet, various baby items are strewn throughout the room. Forget decoration or function. My main goal is now keeping her happy and keeping her things within reach. My entire adult life, I have been on a mission to keep my nails grown out and healthy. The day I went into labor, my nails were perfectly shaped, manicured and all a uniform length. They were perfect. Then Avery arrives with her delicate skin that can be easily scratched by my beautiful nails. Needless to say, the nails were quickly cut down to a very short, very ugly, but very safe for baby length. My days used to be filled with projects, paintings, cleaning and other humdrum activites. Now, my days are filled with diapers, feedings and quick cat naps in between feedings. Nothing else matters except my baby girl and keeping her happy, fed and clean. My thoughts are filled with the last time Avery ate, when I should be taking my medicine, how many diapers we have left in stock and where I placed the Destin cream the last time I used it. If it doesn't relate to my baby, the thought has completely been pushed out of my brain. I no longer worry about what I'm wearing for the day. I throw on a pair of maternity pants and a top that's easy to nurse in and turn my thoughts to which cute outfit baby Avery will be wearing. My alarm clock has been replaced with a baby cry. My cell phone homepage was once filled with games and social media apps. Those have quickly been replaced with a notepad featuring baby's feeding schedule and apps that create white noise to help her sleep. So, to all you soon to be mommies out there....your life is going to change. You'll hear it a hundred times between now and the time that your baby arrives, but I promise, it's all for the better.